skincare overload

organic surge skincare and bodycare collection // £24.99

it's like 20 quid for all this shit!!! look how much shit there is!!! so much shit!!!

never heard of this brand of beauty box (they're called all boxed up if u cba clicking that link) anywhere before and tbh i forgot how i stumbled across it but most of their boxes are a bit crap except for this one like wow what a bargain

in it there's full sizes of a face wash, body cream, eye gel, hand cream, hot cloth cleanser (already tried it, v nice), moisturiser, serum and facial oil. could tell you the full names of everything but think of the EFFORT that would require ://///

ps me n mum took half of the stuff each bc i don't have enough skin to apply all of this on to and also i try to give the illusion that i am a good daughter

do you want to look like your face is not your face

topshop contour cream in swerve // £10
topshop highlighting contour cream in swipe // £10

right so we're all bored to death with people telling us how to contour or whatever and it's all cool when you strategically slap on a bit of brown powder in an effort to look "natural" but what about when you want to go big or go home?? well fear not friends bc i have found these pigmented af creams to make your dream of having a completely different bone structure a reality ur welcome

i haven't seen any other matte white highlighting creams and i was buzzin out my tits to try this one, i use a sponge to apply it to all the places that michelle phan et al. told me to and wowzers it does the job like my face looks so much more 3D than it actually is if that makes sense?? same goes for the contour shade, like next time yer in topshop get these instead of an overpriced pair of earrings they're well good

the good stuff (not drugs)

{eylure texture 117 pre glued lashes // £5.35} {nyx hd blush in taupe // £5.50} {lush cup o' coffee face and body mask // £6.75}
{max factor masterpiece nude palette in cappuccino nudes // £14.99} {anastasia beverly hills dipbrow pomade in ash brown // £15}
{bareminerals complexion rescue foundation // £26} {gerard cosmetics hydra matte liquid lipstick in invasion // £9.50}
  {morphe mb30 deluxe flat contour brush // £11.95} {nyx slim lip pencil in earth tone // £4ish}

v tempted to call this my 2015 faves but it's a bit late now innit

ok so first i just wanna say that i'm so pissed off noone told me about pre-glued lashes sooner?? that's so rude?? the eylure 117s are actual stunners and so easy to apply and have changed my life significantly (not an exaggeration)

i've eventually learned how to do my brows properly (took me bloody long enough) and surprise surprise i now use the abh dipbrow and it's just as good as everyone says it is ok let's move on. also quick shoutout to the new max factor eyeshadow palette for being pigmented and gorgeous af & the lush cup o' coffee scrub for keeping my skin un-flaky

most-worn lip combo at the moment is the nyx lip liner in earth tone with the gerard cosmetics liquid lipstick in invasion and my lips look like those instagram models' lips when i wear these. that's a high level of praise right there

the nyx blush in taupe has been my go-to for contouring for like 2+ years but i recently got the new reformulated version and this brush that's really dense and is the perfect shape for slotting into your cheekbones and guys i'm not kidding my contour game is so strong now!! i've literally had it for about 3 months and i've already hit pan cause i pack it on like there's no tomorrow and i have no regrets you guys it's so good you need to try it

also finally found a foundation that is more than a 6/10 and it's the bareminerals complexion rescue. my foundation always ends up looking patchy at the end of the day and makes my dry patches look awful. NOT THIS ONE FOLKS it's moisturising and has fab coverage and matches my stupidly pale skin and i love it so much.

this is all coming from someone who is scared to express any emotion other than cynicism so yh 

bloody love zara

1 // 2 // 3 // 4 // 5 // 6 // 7 // 8

zara has already stolen over £100 of my money this month & i literally can't spend any more any time soon so here's a list of stuff i plan on buying after it's been an appropriate amount of time (i'd give it 2 weeks tbh)

ya girl got inked

hi i paid some man to stab me multiple times with a needle. not the most fun i've ever had but gonna show y'all cause i've shown it (and therefore a lot of sideboob) to almost everyone i've met in real life so let's just widen that sphere of appreciation

artist is jason corbett, not gonna gush over how talented he is cause i think his skill is pretty evident honestly but wow

is 3-step cleansing overkill

l'oreal extraordinary facial cleansing oil // £7.99
garnier micellar cleansing water // £4.99
ren evercalm gentle cleansing milk // £16

yes hello let's just all ignore that i have been away for many days because i had shit to do and time is an illusion but soz anyway

ok down to business. so my broke lazy ass loves having clean skin & i'm pretty picky, i need my cleansing to be cheap n fast n furious. not too furious though, just the right amount. like 5% furious 95% nice and gentle

i've sworn by cleansing oil ever since it first made contact with my face back in the good ol' days when it was the 2nd hottest kid on the block (i was the hottest). the l'oreal one is the best one i've tried, i just smush a few pumps around my face for a bit and when i rinse it off everything's gone and all that hard work i put into my contour has literally been washed down the drain. a beautiful tragedy

i use micellair water on a cotton pad before going in with the oil if i have loads of eye makeup on just to avoid smearing such vast quantities of black shit everywhere. also fantastic for when you fuck up your eyeliner js

last is my actual "cleanser" cleanser bc i've gone a bit paranoid since hearing too many people talk about the shameful sin that is blocking ur pores so i gotta take extreme measures. i use this cream cleanser by ren (it says it's a cleansing milk but that is Wrong and a lie) after everything else and on its own in the morning. it's super moisturising and gentle and costs the same amount as a weeks' worth of food BLOODY LOVE IT THOUGH 10/10

pink parcel // november 2015

pink parcel // first box for £7.95

aight so i think we can all agree that most beauty boxes are a let down unless ya spend £35 on cohorted, but even then there's a big ol chance of getting something from a hella expensive brand that u still don't like. and personally i have enough disappointments in my life without adding to them and losing $$$ in the process

so u must be thinking wow why the hell did this fool subscribe to another one is she ok?? short answer no but i found a discount code to get a few boxes for £6 each and this brand has a rad concept that i can totally get behind - they send u feminine hygiene stuff (you can time it so it arrives right before ur vag starts doing its thing) and some nice lil extras so that being on your period is less of a shit time.

didn't realise quite how much stuff they send u tho, like i'm swimming in tampons

but the "nice lil extras" are actually so impressive, there's a hand cream, chocolate, brow palette, eyeliner, tea, nail polishes (IN SHADES I'LL ACTUALLY WEAR THANK GOD), sachet of body moisturiser and a soothing balm for headaches. nice thing is that they don't include the RRP of everything so it doesn't seem like they're rubbing it in your face how good value they are but i googled those nail polishes & they're hella expensive so good job

there's also a box marked "for down there" (cause apparently even a tampon box is too embarrassed to use the word vulva) which has some sort of fancy pH balancing serum typa thing idk i haven't had a proper look at it yet which in hindsight i probably should've done before writing this but then again we wouldn't want anyone getting the impression that this is a high quality blog would we hm

lomography 004

LITERALLY THE BEST SET OF PHOTOS I'VE EVER TAKEN I'M SO STOKED OVER THIS ROLL OF FILM I LOVE IT

shot with a lomo lc-a that's got a bit of a back story to it: my babushka brought it over from russia as a gift earlier this year and i was all like omg i'm gonna document my summer on this an it's gonna be cute af

so i took it to t in the park, my bag got stolen in the middle of the night, i cried for hours and went home and 3 weeks later the police found the bag with everything safe nd sound in it (apart from my money obvs but i only had £15 so who cares). this camera has had a more exciting life than me how sad is that

new age

 base: bourjois healthy mix serum foundation, mac mineralize concealer, stila angel light whitening powder foundation, clinique chubby stick sculpting contour, nyx blush in taupe

eyes: maybelline eye studio lasting drama gel eyeliner, kiko glamorous eye pencil in 415

lips: kiko glamorous eye pencil in 415, collection lipstick in scorned

it's a lot easier to stick on a pair of falsies than it is to draw them on with eyeliner let me tell u

usually i stick to yer standard "pretty" makeup, but every so often i like looking a bit weird (though gotta say i did feel kinda naked without any hair framing my face)

do u want a clinique lipstick for £2 of course u do

with the december issue of glamour. got mine in the shade nude pop, there's also a red one i think?? if u want details u could probably find them on a better blog than this lmao

also apparently tanya burr is "queen of everything" now like wow congrats that's quite the title glamour r u sure about that like what about the actual queen. what does she get to be queen of then. tanya's stolen the commonwealth #uhearditherefirst

nice lipstick tho i'm not complaining

so soap and glory attempted skincare

peaches and clean deep cleansing milk // £8

the greatest scrub of all // £9

not impressed, let's start w/ that.

the cleanser ain't the hottest thing out there, i bought it as a replacement for cleansing oil and it just doesn't remove makeup as well so i gotta throw a micellair water into the mix. works gr8 as a morning cleanser though, it says it's a 4-in-1 but i wouldn't read too much into that cause one of the claims is "energizes" and like honestly wtf does that even mean
smells a bit funky too

the exfoliator hasn't got huge chunks of shit in it à la st ives but instead is way more gentle and leaves your skin soo smooth and soft. also it contains salicylic acid which as we all know is really good for some reason BUT my skin just doesn't agree with something in this & made my skin break out hella bad. if your skin isn't an overly sensitive whiny asshole like mine is you might like this (but i'd have half of lush's skincare range on standby just in case)

best a/w lip combo ever not even kidding

mac verve lipstick // £15.50

mac nightmoth lip pencil // £12.50

IT'S AUTUMN AND WE ALL KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS THAT'S RIGHT IT'S TIME TO INSTAGRAM UR PUMPKIN SPICE LATTE WITH A LIPSTICK MARK ON IT

HERE IS THE LIPSTICK 4 THAT VERY PURPOSE I PROMISE U WILL GET #INSTAFAMOUS

specs: verve is as close as u can get to having a vampy nude without it being an oxymoron. nightmoth is just dark af

best thing is we all know what mac lipsticks are like so i don't even need to describe the formula

natasha out

b&w

base: garnier miracle skin perfector bb cream, mac mineralize concealer, stila eyeshadow in ebony

eyes: maybelline eye studio lasting drama gel eyeliner, laura mercier long lash mascara

lips: maybelline eye studio lasting drama gel eyeliner, mac mineralize concealer

literally just wanted to see what i would look like with extreme contouring. it's not showing up 100% but trust me the sides of my face were dark af & i'm already missing having any sort of cheekbone definition (the blending isn't perfect but i ran out of clean brushes sry bout it)

lil uni room tour just 4 the banter

look how cute my room is tho!!! so proud ♡♡♡
i'd show you my storage and ensuite but let's be real they ain't that photogenic and there's one too many bottles of vodka lying around for it not to be embarrassing - but let's gloss over that and turn our attention to how that last photo is the view from my window, NOT BAD AT ALL HUH (yes that's a castle)

few other things of note: i downsized my makeup collection so the majority of it can now fit in four muji drawers & i love it so much, i feel like i'm actually appreciating and using every single product i own u feel?? also turned the corkboard behind my desk into a makeshift necklace hanger using drawing pins (talk about using ur initiative)

although i have around twice the storage space i had at home there's still nowhere to put my keyboard so it's just sitting at the bottom of my bed. gotta keep it casual yknow

and no i don't actually keep my cacti in direct sunlight if u were worried, just put them there 4 the #aesthetic